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September 28 So Sad...I ate another parking ticket today... I totally forgot where I parked over the weekend. I thought I parked at the place where street cleaning is on Wed. then I went there this morning and couldn't find my car. so I was like, OMG, where it is? and I finally found my car, I parked it at the place where today is street cleaning.... so I donate another 53 buck to SF government!!!!!! so sad! In less than 2 weeks, I had 2 parking tickets. It has been only 2 days and my memory is gone. Am I really having amnesia????? September 21 9/16/2009是一个特别的日子。也算是我在MA里的一个里程碑。 找到一个志同道合的人，找到一个能认同自己的人一点都不容易。 因此要把这个日子好好纪念下来。 以后的道路还是很漫长，我不知道我的战友们会否有这个勇气与决心陪我一直走下去，直到采集到成功的果实，但是，我相信，只要我们坚持，一定会得到丰厚的回报。 It's tough but we are having fun! September 16 爱无能很喜欢作者的文笔，也同意他所说的。 我也一直认为爱情像是生活中的点缀品，有的话，会比较有趣。没有的话，也死不了。反正人生在世，可以做的事情，除了爱情，还有很多。 单身又好，恋爱又好，习惯了，就好。 转载 王文华的爱无能 (source from http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_4bb7511e010007ee.html~type=v5_one&label=rela_prevarticle) 有一段时间，我觉得我病了。 还在企业工作时，接受采访或参加活动，别人给我的头衔是「迪士尼电影公司行销经理」、「MTV电视台总经理」。前年开始不上班了，苦了要介绍我的人。于是我当过「知名作家」、「行销达人」、「职场专家」、或「史丹佛MBA」。最近常被叫到的，是「爱情教主」。 「教主」？蔡依林是教主，我只是怪叔叔。我如果不是我，而是一个不认识我的人，看到我这样一个快40岁、还没结婚、没几次恋爱经验的男人被称为「爱情教主」，一定会想：别闹了！ 不知道什么时候开始，我跟「爱」这个字解下不解之缘。 其实我一开始并不是写爱情的。高中时发表第一篇的文章，叫「飘落」，写学校门口一位卖茶叶蛋的孤苦老人。「生命飘落，我没有买茶叶蛋，却已尝到苦果」。在那为赋新词强说愁的年纪，我的愁比爱多。 像所有文艺青年，我去编校刊。像所有编校刊的人，大部分的文章都是用不同的笔名自己写。那时对爱情不屑，崇拜的是罗大佑的长发，和杜斯妥也夫斯基的《罪与罚》。对忧国忧民的我们来说，爱情很肤浅。写爱情，甚至谈恋爱的人，都在招摇撞骗。 这种想法延续到大学。上了大学，当然开始谈恋爱了。但文学创作，还是要有严肃的主题。我念的是外文系，在课堂上学了各种文学理论和技巧。下课后，我迫不急待地用在作品中。那时的小说像字典，有着艰涩的文字，却没有新鲜的感情。 真正写爱情小说，是到美国念书以后。留学生活苦闷，对爱的渴望就更高。在台湾觉得是「恐龙」的女生，到那里都当作宝。我看到在美国的华人，包括我在内，把爱，当成化解乡愁、对抗疏离感的工具。如果没有家让我们建立归属感，爱至少是中途的休息站。 于是我在短篇小说集《旧金山下雨了》中，写了好几篇爱情故事。那些故事没有加州阳光的灿烂，充满了倾盆大雨的悲欢。 但我真正被归类成「爱情作家」，是2001年的《蛋白质女孩》。这本所谓的「爱情小说」，本质是反爱情的。因为它用冷嘲热讽的笔法、尖酸刻薄的观点，把都会上班族的爱，彻底地戏弄了一番。 《蛋白质女孩》畅销后，我变成「爱情专家」。变成「爱情专家」后，每个人都跟我「谈」恋爱，但很少人爱上我。一位我追求过的女生告诉我：「《蛋白质女孩》把男女之间所有招术都拆穿了，你一定很有经验。和你谈恋爱，就像跟妇产科医师亲热一样，既没安全感，也不好玩。」 大人冤枉啊！小的其实没什么经验！《蛋白质女孩》写的故事，大多是我观察所得。我不是「爱情专家」，顶多只是一个「爱情记者」。 她当然不相信，男朋友没做成，我勉强答应成为她的顾问。 她 不相信，写《蛋白质女孩》之前，我就不是情圣。写了之后，也没变成入定的老僧。《蛋白质女孩》畅销后，我谈了一场恋爱。过程中，我犯了所有我在书中警告读 者的错误：太早跟对方说「我爱你」、太晚承认两人不适合、天真地相信破镜可以重圆，最后只是不断地在原地转圈。多少夜里，我绝望地看着自己写的书，希望从 其中得到一点智慧。我的文笔，远远超越了我的行为。 《蛋白质女孩》之后，我又出了《61 x 57》、 《倒数第二个女朋友》两本爱情小说，书很畅销，但我变得越来越小。渐渐的，「爱情专家」的头衔遮盖住我其他的身份，包括专业经理人。参加行销演讲，主持人 介绍了我的学历和工作，最后说他知道王文华还是因为《蛋白质女孩》。当我写职场的文章，编辑会很客气地告诉我：「王先生，您写得很好，但可不可以再《蛋白 质女孩》一点！」 「怎么说？」我问。 「可不可以压韵？」 你千万不要误会，这不是埋怨，其实当「爱情专家」，有很多福利。首先是女人缘特好。我的女性朋友，半夜三更会来敲我的门，不是要跟我一夜情，而是来跟我交心。我披着棉被、揉着眼睛，却还能以Ph. D的理论基础，和电视名嘴的锋利口气，剖析她为什么该离开那个男人。从我那「大江东去浪涛尽」的自信表情中，她绝对想不到，其实不久之前，我也跟她一样惊惶失措，病急乱投医。只是我不好意思去问另一位「爱情专家」，唯一能求助的只有好莱坞电影。 当 「爱情专家」的另一项福利是：还是有美女会把我的书和我的人混为一谈，莫名其妙地爱上我。我当然不会告诉她，其实我没有我写的角色那么潇洒、浪漫。不过我 也不会占她的便宜，事后让她发现我也不过如此而已。我不是专家，但至少知道：地基不稳的爱，最后两个人都会被活埋。对于这类的美女我只好忍痛疏远，像教授 避诲师生恋，像黑夜慢慢送走白天。 这样下来，轰轰烈烈的恋爱就少了。一次上内地一个电视栏目，主持人直接问我：「你对爱情很了解，却到现在还没结婚，是不是『爱无能』？」 爱什么？ 当时我听到这三个字，觉得比「性无能」更要羞愧。你若说我「性无能」，我无所谓，毕竟没人把我当超级种马。但你说我「爱无能」，那我还当什么爱情专家？这就好像是说电机系的教授不会用录影机，美术系的系主任不会刷油漆。吾道一以贯之，爱情而已矣！若是爱无能，就不用混了！ 但混不混这一行无所谓，是不是「爱无能」比较重要。从上海回来的飞机上，我把最近喜欢过的女子的名字写在纸巾上，猛然发现：这几年来我很少有「完整的爱」，只有零星的「爱的感觉」。 完整的爱你知道是什么：一见钟情、天天见面、一天打十次电话、上电影院看每一部新片、想要结婚、买房子、生小孩、一起变老。 零 星的爱的感觉，是喜欢她的发型、想摸她的脖子、爱听她说某一个英文单字的声音、着迷她生气时拧眉头的表情。如果时间静止，我愿意一直停留在她做那个表情的 剎那。但时间是流动的，静止画面结束后，她要去出差，我要去录影，而我们似乎都没有，早早把下一次约会时间讲好的决心。 老天！这不就是「爱无能」的征兆吗？明明有爱的感觉，却没有把它变成爱情的能力！就像天空是一片乌云，却连下一滴雨都不愿意。 「性无能」还可吃药，「爱无能」能吃什么？ 当我怀疑自己可能染上这可怕的隐疾后，我力求镇定，并利用我小小的名气和空服员调情，跟她交换了手机。回到台北之后，我明察暗访了一番，宣称是为了电视栏目做研究，其实是要看多少人跟我有同样的毛病。 然后我发现：身旁有很多爱无能的人。 他们都是30几岁的异性恋者，有不错的条件，过去也谈过恋爱，曾经劈腿，也曾被劈。但现在下班后都宁愿在公司上MSN，搞到八九点。离开公司只想去做瑜珈和敷脸，没兴趣在电影院等人或排队。 Why？ 太压抑了吗？ 没那么简单。 也许他们过去都爱过，知道费尽全力的爱是多么辛苦。如果没有遇到真正心动的对象，还是不要轻易付出。嘿，林志玲若爱上我，我当然奋不顾身、十项全能。但捷运上擦肩而过的可爱女生，嗯……还是回家看电视吧！ 也许他们不爱久了，忘了爱的滋味，也就甘愿把生活降低一级，从其他事物中找乐趣。就像糖尿病人少吃甜的，还是活得很好。没有爱的人忌了爱，虽然不方便，但还是活得下去。 也许他们事业有成、年纪大了，不愿再配合别人。谈恋爱是要卑躬屈膝、随时妥协的。你若已然习惯了睡成「大」字形，谁愿意再缩成「1」。环顾四周的朋友，不管已婚或未婚，真正好的爱情很少。所以大家愿意为爱付出的代价，也就降低。 也许他们觉得「完整的爱」不可靠，零星的「爱的感觉」就可以饱。于是伴侣像牙刷，三个月换一支。「你不会觉得空虚吗？」「不会啊！那些从头到尾只用一支牙刷的人，也不见得有一口白牙！」 也许正因为他们爱过，所以对爱有更高的标准。家家酒和一夜情，没办法引起他们的兴趣。这种人要嘛就是自怨自艾、孤苦一身。要嘛就是压中头彩，变成赌神！ 我不知道我是哪一种，我相信大多数和我一样的单身族也不知道。我们并没有把单身当作一种光荣在信守，只是把单身当作一种状态在接受。就像夏天的艳阳，不舒服，但死不了。防晒做得好，搞不好还可以晒出漂亮的古铜色。 明天又要去演讲了，讲的是我拿手的爱情。台下会有期盼的眼光，希望这位爱情专家的某一句话，能对所有的问题提出解答。我知道那是不可能的，但我希望他们继续保持这种幻想。爱情艰难，单身的国度处于无政府状态。如果专家的存在能增加大家的安全感，我会珍惜这个皇冠。 还有，空服员打电话来了，我们约定共进晚餐。谁知道呢？也许她能治好我的爱无能。 September 14 Randy Pausch “…the brick walls are there for a
reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls
are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something.
Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it
badly enough. They are there to stop the other people.” -- Randy Pausch I really like this sentence. It tells exactly the reason I am not achieving what I want to achieve with my Market America business. It doesn't matter what we do. We need to know WHY. If we know WHY, we will know HOW. We won't stop because of the obstacles, we will find ways to overcome anything that's on our ways. September 10 Terrible Customer Service from the City of SacramentoI often found the customer service from the city, state, or whatever, as long as it's government related, is terrible. Doesn't matter if it's in China or USA. Their attitude is just so unbearable that I think they need additional professional training in order to serve their customers again. My aunt recently moved in to her new house and she did some yard work. But nobody picked up the yard waste. So she wanted me to call the city to find out the pickup date for yard waste. So I called 311, which is suppose to be a convenience city service and was told that yard waste was pickup periodically. I asked how do you define periodically? The answer is: it's not a guarantee weekly service. So 2 weeks passed. Still the yard waste was un-pickuped. So I had to call 311 again and this time I was told the service was not setuped at my aunt's address and they transfered my call to billing. Billing told me that the service was not setuped because the street my aunt lives at is a private street. What the heck? I told her it's a public street, The rep said, my map shows that it's not a private street but the computer said it's a private street so there's nothing I can do about it. I need to pass your case to a specialist to follow up. I'll give you a call back. (obviously, it's someone who enters the information incorrectly when doing data entry but they are dumb enough not to know how to fix the small mistake and has to pass to a Specialist? What a joke! ) I asked, "when do I expect a call back? " She said, "as soon as my specialist gets back to me." "Well, you have to give me a time frame. In a day? a week or what?" She said, " I don't know what time she will gets back to me." (starts to throw the ball out of her hand. ) I asked, "can you call me back today no matter what? Because I need to find out." She said "ok." Customer service closed at 4pm. I waited till 3:30pm, no call back. I called again. Another rep told me that both the person I spoke to earlier and the specialist were at the meeting. They would call me soon. I said, "Soon? The yard waste has been sitting there for more than 2 weeks and how much longer do you want me to wait?" "You just called today." She said. I said, "But I called 311 2 weeks ago." "Well 311 is not us." She replied. Ok, tomorrow came, still no call back. I called again and said I am calling to following up on my account status. I was suppose to receive a call back but no one calls me back. The rep said, "why do we need to call you back? There's no note or nothing indicate that we will call you back." OMG! So now you are telling me I am making up stories?????? My aunt just wants to get the yard waste out asap. That's all we want! She said, your residence doesn't have any lawn or gardening service setup. So we will charge $60 for one time pickup or you can sign up for monthly service. I told her there's no service setup because your rep told me the street was on a private street but it was not. So you guys can't setup anything for us to get the trash out. She said, "oh, hold on then. Let me check." Put me on hold for more than 10 minutes...... (was she out on her break? ) I eventually had to hang up because I din't know how much longer I needed to wait. (How rude! Putting customer on hold for more than 10 minutes without getting back to me! If you got back to me in a few minutes and and said, sorry, I have to investigate a little longer, can you hold on for a little longer? I would think that at least you were not ignoring me. But more than 10 minutes, complete silence, what do you want me to think besides rude and terrible customer service!) So I called my aunt to let her know what happened. She decided to dump the yard waste into trash can little by little and hope to get rid of them in a few weeks because she can't rely on customer service anymore. My conclusion on service from City of Sacramento? Sucks! September 03 我要努力！我不想跟某人在同一個topic再糾纏下去。 成王敗寇，當你能做出成績出來，你便是英雄，你說的話便是真理。當你甚麼都做不出的時候，你便是狗熊，你說的話便是放屁。這個世界永遠都是如此現實。 我望吃豉椒炒魷，這樣我就可以用破斧沉舟的心態來創一番事業！ |
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